Using Patience In Stress Management


Patience is something that many people want to cultivate in their lives. But how many times have you not felt capable of this?

How many times have you flown off the handle or got really frustrated in a situation rather than being calm and kind?

I remember the first time I came across the teachings of being patient when I lived in the Buddhist monastery. I was in my 20s and although I had heard about the word many times I didn't really feel that I knew that much about what it was.

At the time I was going through a reasonably challenging period. My old patterns were not working very well and I was getting very frustrated on a regular basis.

So I made a trip to the Abbot's cottage...

I asked him what I could do to deal with everything being thrown up in my life: family, emotions, anger, depression etc. He looked at me calmly and started to tell me about this technique.

He said that what I needed to do was to start to cultivate patience. Now, at that time, this was not really what I wanted to hear - I wanted a quick solution and an easy fix (as most of us do to our problems). But the Abbot pointed out that the best way to cultivate this part of ourselves is when things are not going well.

He continued by saying that, when things are going smoothly in life, this is not the time that we can cultivate this.

Learning to be patient requires things to be not the way you want. When things are tough this is the prime learning space for cultivating this part of ourselves.

So this became my motto over the years in the monastery. When things became challenging (or I made them challenging) I remembered his words about patient perseverance.

But how do you bring this into your own life?

How To Use Patience As A Stress Relief

The following steps will help you to find more calm in your life:

Step 1

Learn to change situations round - seeing them as an opportunity for growth rather than for stress.

By seeing what you can learn rather than what is distressing you puts you in charge.

Step 2

When things are really tough and you want to give up remember this one phrase that I have used for many years:

When all else fails all I can do is breathe

This is a great way of seeing that sometimes we can make so much out of a situation - and just by keeping it simple - breathing - you regain clarity in your life.

We make things more than they are - the mind takes over and we suddenly find ourselves in a really unhappy space. So remember this and breathe deeply as much as you can.

Step 3

One of the ways I have cultivated calm over the years is through my meditation practice. I have found that by meditating I am cultivating patience, I am cultivating peace of mind and emotions.

I have found that by meditating regularly I take this inner calm out into the outside world and therefore I do not attract the stressful situations in as much. I see them before they arrive and know what to do.

Meditation is my choice of ways to help myself to cultivate more calm in my life.

If you want to learn more about meditation then please visit Brainsync who have been making guided meditations for several years.

I certainly found that learning meditation from an MP3 to be very powerful and it has helped to keep my practice going.


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